Ridiculing Rocks

I don't really have time to do this. So why am I? I also don't know what to write about. I'm just writing, not very good writing, but writing nonetheless. OH I KNOW! Let's make fun of a document from when I was in elementary school. I'm gonna go find one... Oh look I found one from 4th grade because in 5th grade I was an OK enough writer that it would be hard to make fun of. I really began to understand writing that year... YES I CAN ACTUALLY WRItE IF I ACTUALLY TRY, ARIGATO GOZAIMAS.
here it is

(there was no title but it's about pet rocks)

Hannah Hairstylist is very colorful with browns, blues, oranges, reds, and peach color. Her shape is a little bit egg-like, and her size about as large as certain books. Hannah has a rough texture and is not shiny except for little bits of shimmer on her skin. Hannah’s face has blue eyes with eyelashes, a nose which is a very little dot, a mouth with lips, and hair. Her hair is different colored with highlights,and is nearly always in a ponytail with bangs. Hannah Hairstylist has peach colored arms, orange legs, and peach colored skin. She is a healthy rock even though she weighs over one hundred ninety grams. My rock’s clothing and accessories are a brown outfit, red shoes, and scissors. Hannah lives in a calm river in a big bed of moss. Her special abilities include walking on her back and giving random rocks scars with her diamond scissors. If you can’t contact Hannah or you want to know more about her, Julia Ladybug, Oreo Mahoney, Slinkie Snake, Ocean Easter Egg, Blue Jeans Horse and her rider Jessie Person are her close friends. Hannah and her friends like to cut hair, roller skate, and call each other on the phone. (If you want a haircut her number is 123-cut-hair). Clearly, Hannah Hairstylist can be a handful, but is also super fun to be with!

now let's ridicule it and pull it apart.

black is original text

blue is what i say now

Hannah Hairstylist what kind of name is this (no offense to hairstylists named hannah, just why is that her last name) is very colorful with browns, blues, oranges, reds, and peach color. is she ok Her shape is a little bit egg-like, and her size about as large as certain books. Hannah has a rough texture and is not shiny except for little bits of shimmer on her skin. this makes so much sense. next year i is good at grammars Hannah’s face has blue eyes with eyelashes, a nose which is a very little dot, a mouth with lips, and hair. good job. why didn't i say after the rock was decorated? this makes it sound like the rock has a face. actually, i didn't even mention she was a pet rock. Her hair is different colored with highlights,and is nearly always in a ponytail with bangs. so fashion Hannah Hairstylist has peach colored arms, orange legs, and peach colored skin. you gots to gives those legs tans She is a healthy rock even though she weighs over one hundred ninety grams. "healthy". she was the heaviest rock in the class, if i remember correctly. or maybe second heaviest? i don't remember what she looks like though. My rock’s clothing and accessories are a brown outfit, red shoes, and scissors. AND SCISSORS. Hannah lives in a calm river in a big bed of moss. Her special abilities include walking on her back O.o WHY and giving random rocks scars WHAT with her diamond scissors. oh, that makes it all better, with her DIAMOND SCISSORS. If you can’t contact Hannah or you want to know more about her, Julia Ladybug, Oreo Mahoney, Slinkie Snake, Ocean Easter Egg, Blue Jeans Horse and her rider Jessie Person are her close friends. Hannah and her friends like to cut hair, yeah, fun. WAIT NO IT'S NOT roller skate, and call each other on the phone. (If you want a haircut her number is 123-cut-hair). yes, could i PLEASE have a diamond scissors haircut!? Clearly, Hannah Hairstylist can be a handful, but is also super fun to be with! clearly

that was... fun
wow